noggin knockin’


(the photo has nothing to do with this post – I just felt like adding an image from my archives to liven things up) (it’s not blurry, by the way, it’s an artistic rendering of my state of mind at that moment)

I got up bright and early this morning and headed to Toys R Us to buy some props for the show. You know you’re writing sophisticated material when your props can be found at a toy store. I had to buy a baseball bat made of foam or some other soft material. There were numerous choices, so in order to decide which bat to buy I had to hit myself on the head. Early Saturday morning in a toy store. I repeatedly knocked myself in the noggin with three different bats. Over and over again, trying to get the one with the right heft and realistic looks. And I wasn’t arrested or asked to leave the store. I consider that a successful prop shopping experience.

In addition to the bat, I wanted to buy some realistic toy guns. Everything they had at the toy store was neon colored. Guess the days of fake uzis that look like the real thing are behind us. James offered to loan me a real gun, which isn’t an option because a) it’s too dangerous, even if we know it’s not loaded (see: Brandon Lee) and b) we’re performing in the backyard of a bar. Isn’t it illegal to have a gun in a bar? If it isn’t, it should be. I say this as a person who worked in bars for a decade. That’s no place for children or guns. Or children with guns.