on the occasion of my 40th birthday


These three lovely friends (plus James – you can see him in the backyard if you look through the window) (you can also see me taking the picture if you look at the window) (trippy) threw me quite a 40th birthday bash. The party started at 8PM and the last guest left a little after 3AM. I had a hangover that lasted all day Sunday, and I felt every minute of my age. Today is much better. I’m going to have lunch with my parents and watch Zombieland tonight on the couch with James and the dogs.

Early this morning, while I was dreaming, I turned 40. This is a monumental birthday. Not just because of the number in general but also because of life in particular. Losing my brother Mason almost four months ago changed the way I look at everything. My life. Your life. Our lives. Here’s where I’m at:

– Once your perspective has been…enhanced, I think you should do what you can to try to keep it that way. I have let a lot of the petty irritations just float away. They aren’t important. I feel remarkably lighter as a consequence.

– The George Eliot quote It is never too late to become what you might have been. is my new mantra.

– I will never again waste time on people/relationships that don’t elevate both parties. Gone is my already small amount of patience for people who have constant drama, negative attitudes or are uninspired. I have no desire to “fix” people, nor do I want to be around people who try to “fix” me.

– Instead of saying, “I want to do that one day,” I’m doing things today or at least putting in place an action plan to do them as soon as possible. I’ve always been interested in gardening. Now (thanks to a gift from James’ mom) I have a garden. I desired to make my home a retreat from the hustle and the bustle. (Remember: If there’s a bustle in your hedgerow, don’t be alarmed now. It’s just a spring clean for the May queen.) Now I live in a funky house in a part of town I’d never been in before with a big yard and a huge fireplace. I’ve planted flowers, and my hands have been intimate with the dirt. I continue to ride the creaky old swing in my backyard – knowing full well I’ll be landing on my ass soon – because it sho is fun until the fall. I feel most “myself” when I’m putting on a play, so I will do that more often. I’ve a long list of things to keep me busy for a while, and I’m sure items will be added as I go and as I watch you guys do cool things that inspire me.

– At every opportunity, allowing for necessary “alone” time, I will hang out with my family and my friends and smile as I look into their faces, glad we have each other. I suggest you do the same.

(Here’s my awesome birthday cake – thanks Dennis!:


More pictures and party recap to come as soon as I get pix from my friend who played photog.)

PS – Someone left a happy little surprise for me in my bathroom cabinet, I hope in response to my last entry. I’ll post a picture of the surprise when I do the party recap. And also who I think left it for me.