800 rat dogs (that looks like a phone number)

When I think about the future, there are two things that are constant: my desire for a writing cabin in the woods and my hope to have a dog farm. So you can imagine how my ears perked up when I heard about the elderly couple in Arizona who had 800 (holy shit!) rat dogs in their triple-wide (holy shit!) home. I can’t even imagine how 800 dogs, even of the rat-sized variety, could fit into any small area unless they were balanced on each others’ backs like the Bremen Town Musicians (how’s that for a totally random reference?).

I visited the website of the poor humane society that is now taxed with saving as many of these dogs as possible and gave them $25. I’d go get one of the dogs if I could (rat dog is my favorite flavor of dog, you know), but we’re dog full with Stella and Dali. Plus, Stella would be PISSED if I brought home another rat dog. She and Dali get along because there is about 60 pounds difference between the two of them. They fulfill different dogness. Two rat dogs in the same house is asking for trouble.

Also, people tend to flock to “celebrity” animals while other just as important animals go ignored at the same shelter. Everyone wants a Katrina dog or a three legged, blind dog because it makes a great story when people come over for dinner. You know, as a physical manifestation of someone’s overabundant humanity. So a lot of these rat dogs (the ones that survive – not surprisingly many are ill and some have already died) will probably be adopted out, much to the detriment of the other dogs at that shelter. So I gave them a little bit of money just to support the cause.

As for my dog farm, I’m picturing a much different operation (obviously). I’m thinking lots of acreage with vet school students living on the property to tend to the animals. That’s a far cry from a triple-wide.