I’m watching the Tony Awards. They just presented a song from the Broadway version of the Adam Sandler movie The Wedding Singer. Comic songwriter Stephen Lynch is in Sandler’s role. Lynch has written some pretty fucking funny songs in the past, so it’s odd (perhaps disturbing) to see him in such a sappy role. For instance, here’s the beginning of one of Lynch’s songs:
When the game of life makes you feel like quittin’,
It helps a lot if you kill a kitten
Mark my words, cause from where I’m sittin,
You can’t go wrong if you kill a kitten.
I could have found a funnier quote from him, but I like the fact that this song’s about killing a kitten. Anyway, I’ve never been very fond of the musical as an art form. I don’t like people breaking into song for no reason. In the musical, two actors can be in the midst of doing the dishes and next thing you know, soap suds are flying about the room and fifteen people are jumping up on the microwave and popping each other in the ass with towels and someone’s singing into a drumstick (the chicken kind, not the drum-playing kind) and everyone’s way too fucking happy to be doing the dishes.
Thus far, no one has said anything interesting in their acceptance speeches. Stage actors tend to behave better than film actors at these awards shows. Boring. Hopefully they’re all drinking and things will get more interesting as the night goes on. Maybe one of the big winners will say something of note. It would be much more interesting than the guy who just won, stood at the microphone on stage bawling like a baby and managed to get out “Poppa, this one’s for us,” and then launched into a maudlin tale about his immigrant daddy. Jackass.