how was your weekend?

How was your weekend?
Good, how was yours?

It was great. Tough coming in today though.
I hear ya. Mondays suck.

Yeah.
[Silence]
Well, have a good one.

You too. Only five days to go…

There are two interesting things about the “how was your weekend” conversation. On the one hand, the person asking about the weekend usually doesn’t give a shit about the response – they are asking out of courtesy/habit or as an excuse to talk about their own experiences. On the other hand, some people really aren’t very honest about what they did. Someone’s not going to say, “Well, my husband went out with the guys again for, like, the eighth night in a row and I was feeling sorry for myself and lonely so I ate almost an entire cheesecake, puked it up, drank half a bottle of wine, danced naked in front of a full-length mirror to an old Michael Jackson song, tried to fit into the one pair of jeans I’ve kept since high school, felt fat again, sat in a bathtub crying until the water turned cold, then put my pruny ass in some feet pajamas and went to bed.” Or “Since I feel so emasculated by society, I decided to exact revenge on my neighbors. I think are really robots in fleshy disguise. I broke into their house while they were out, to dinner I think. I waited for them in their bedroom. I stayed hidden under the bed until they were just about asleep. I crawled out from under the bed and slit their throats with a knife I found in a kitchen drawer. I didn’t know robots could bleed.”

I’m not trying to suggest my coworkers are spineless, sobbing pushovers or that any of them are maniacal killers. I’m just saying that I’ll bet some of BTK’s coworkers asked about his weekend and he probably wasn’t forthcoming. The point is, if you’re friends with someone, they’ll tell you what they did over the weekend, if it was at all interesting. If you have to pry into someone’s life, you probably aren’t going to get the real story. And if you want to talk about your weekend, just do it. Don’t placate people with faux interest in their lives when your whole motivation is to talk about yourself.