having to pee

I was just thinking about my bladder. If I were stuck in traffic for 8 to 10 hours trying to get the hell outta Dodge, what would I do about needing to pee? What are the other bladder-challenged people (women) doing right now? Men can pee in a bottle (Jim Croce wanted to save time in a bottle). Women have no such option.

Never thought I’d see the day when fast food restaurants were closed. How about their plans for world domination? People’s arteries might actually get moving again, having a day or two off from the deep fat.

Have spent a few hours “making” ice and water. Since there has been no water at the stores for a couple of days (there was one guy selling water from a big water delivery truck – Sierra Springs, maybe – in the parking lot of a grocery store in the Heights – I’m not going to bend over for water when it’s readily available from my tap and just needs a quick trip through the Brita filter – what a jackass), I’m filtering water here and putting it into big containers.

I measured the Miata, and it will just fit on the porch. I’m not kidding – it would have about an inch clearance on every side, but it could fit up there. Like it was made for it. Just thinking about what I would do if the water started creeping up the driveway. Of course, by the time the storm has begun flooding, I’m sure I’ll be too tanked to do such precious driving. If I’m going to be white trash and “ride this storm out,” I’m going to be drunk. Even bought some Schlitz. I mean, Shitz. Hell yeah, mofo. And if the media stops by, I’ll be sure to go outside sans bra and holding a can just to complete the tableau.

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